We're Moving!!!!

We're moving to T4Treasure.com!

I have really exciting news: We're moving!!!!!

Well, the blog is at least. My focus and goal in having the blog has changed since I originally started it and I want the blog and name to reflect that.

In the next month or so, I will be moving the blog to a new web address. This will give me greater control of the appearance of my blog and hopefully make it easier for everyone to follow. (There were a few people that couldn't remember the site address and Googling was never helpful.)

I'm really excited for the re-launch and some of the ideas I have. So stay tuned and I'll let you know when you can visit us at our new home: T4Treasure.com.

Treasure Today - You Only Get One!

Treasure Today - You Only Get One!

Temi Talks: I Sorry

We taught Tempess to apologize when she did something wrong and now the following conversation is common place in our house.

Todd: TEMPESS!!!
Temi: I sorry Daddy, it's ok. I sorry. I not do that. I luh zhou!

I guess now we have to teach her to only apologize if she truly is remorseful.

Temi Talks: Foot Hort

Tempess has reached a stage where only Mommy can do everything. Daddy can't do it. Regardless of what it is.

Unless it's skate. Then in that case, "Mommy you can't skate. Your foot hort. You stay here and me and Daddy go so you don't hort your foot."

How thoughtful!

Daddy Say What?!?!: Ma Ma

Tové: DaaaaaaaDaaaaaa
Todd: How about Ma Ma?
Me: You tired of her saying DaDa?
Todd: Yes!!

Guess Who Finally Has Teeth?

Not that being toothless has stopped her from enjoying the finer things in life, such as her sister's chips or her daddy's chicken.

And if you're in denial - like I am - about just how big she's getting, check out these videos of her getting around:

 Tové's First Steps 

 If At First You Fall (Tové Walks) 

This-A Make-A Me Happy

Dinner time with T4 and here's why:

Since I went back to work 2.5 years ago, I have struggled with my decision to do so. It was always my dream to be a stay-at-home mom. I wanted to raise my kids and give them the solid foundation they needed. I wanted to invest wholeheartedly in them. I didn't want them to feel that anyone or thing came before them. I didn't wanna be that workaholic who missed those treasured moments.

Then I got pregnant unplanned. And people talked. And the joy I was supposed to feel was replaced with this ever-burning need to prove myself.

→Prove that my innocent child wasn't ruining my life.
→Prove that I wasn't just some non-contributing member of my family laying around, waiting for Todd to take care of me. (Man, the way some people talk about stay-at-home moms is heartbreaking, to say the least.)
→Prove that I wasn't a failure at life.
→Prove that I could take care of this little person that I had brought into the world despite being told to do otherwise.

So, I went back to work. I had this child that I did not plan, but that was not going to stop me from giving her the world that I wanted her to have. It would just have to be modified.

☆★I want to stop here and say that Todd was 100% on board with whichever decision I made - stay at home or go back to work - so long as our bills were paid. And, our bills would be paid if I stayed at home, but that's all. There would be no saving, no room for growth. And, if something happened to Todd, I'd be in no position to carry us.★☆

So I went back to work, so we could give our daughter the childhood we wanted her to have. Only I felt like I was failing her. Our commute made for long days and I'd come home tired, then had to cook and off to bed she went. Our only "time" together was in the car.

Even after having another child and going through the routine a second time, I still hadn't figured it out. I wasn't giving my children the time and piece of me that I felt they deserved. Rolls on the floor and dance parties were reserved for Saturday's. There was little time to just sit in the amazingness that is them. Because there's always something to do.

Then we moved and bought a dining table. And BAM! Instant family time.

This little piece of furniture has added so much to my life in the past month. We went from eating in front of a Netflix-playing TV, not saying one word to each other to sitting around a table talking to each other. And, I love every minute of it. I suddenly feel like I've gained extra time with my daughters.

And the best part? Temi insists on leading us in grace every meal.

To keep this little piece of happiness, our table is a device-free zone during meals. No phones, iPad, TV or laptop.

And, this-a make-a me happy! ♡♥

*Don't mind the shirtless girl who wants her "shirt off like Daddy!"

Speaking Your Mind Or Being Disrespectful

"Respect Your Elders."

That was one of my mom's golden rules growing up. Disobeying that was a cardinal sin. It made her look bad, and among other things, she would not have a disrespectful child. She'd kill you first. As a result, my family will tell you I had manners. Instinctively, I still say "Hello, how are you?" on the phone.

Talking back was a huge no-no. If someone older than you said something, it was fact. You didn't disagree. You didn't correct. You didn't argue. No ands, ifs or buts about it.

I never thought twice about this rule until I started working in corporate America. I went from my peers being the same age as me to being the youngest on my team, even if I wasn't the lowest salary grade.

I faced an even stronger internal struggle in Kansas where my friends were 10+ years older than me. I had friends that were the same age as my aunt! Luckily, they never made me feel like I was just some youth's that needed to stay in a child's place. However, there would be times where I was reminded that they were closer to my parents' age than my own. And in those times, I would often wonder if my conversations with them were perceived as disrespectful. There were times where we had some pretty intense debates, and though there was no love lost I couldn't help but wonder if my speaking my mind was taking as me talking back.

I've been reading a lot of professional development articles lately and I've noticed that I have a lot of mild mannerisms. In other words, I lean out when I need to lean in. I know why this is. I don't want to be seen as confrontational or disrespectful. But the problem is I've been employed because they want me to challenge them. The powers that be decided I bring a fresh new perspective and they welcome me speaking up.

I'm just not always good at it. But I need to be. If I want to have the career that I desire, I need to find my voice and use it - loudly and clearly.

I also need to teach my daughters how to find their voices. To navigate the lines of respecting others without silencing themselves. I want them to know that they should always have respect for others as human beings, regardless of age. And, that their opinion is not any less significant because they may be younger. It's important that they know they can speak up and offer a differing opinion without being considered disrespectful.

Their future careers depend on it. Their value and worth, the way they see the world depends on it.

Momfessions: Sleeping Together

Todd wants Tempess to sleep in her bed. I don't mind.

Tempess wants to sleep with Mommy. I don't mind that either.

As much as I like having a bed to myself (since 90% of the time someone falls asleep on the futon in front of the PS3), I also like that warm, fuzzy feeling I get when little arms wrap around my neck and giggle "I luh zhoo!"

Nothing says sweet dreams like a toddler who wants you to be a part of their every moment, both waking and sleeping.

But nothing says wine like a toddler who wants you to lay still while they reenact Five Monkeys and you got ish to do.

For now, I choose the former. It gets me through the long days and lets me know that even when I think I'm messing this Mommydom thing up, somebody thinks I'm doing it right.

Tempess, Tempess, Tempess, Tové

A few nights ago, Tové and I were sitting on the couch when she started crawling to the edge. She pulled herself up and started leaning over trying to grab stuff from the table. I let her assert her independence for 0.2 seconds before....

Tempess.

Nothing.

Tempess.

Still nothing.

TEMPESS!

Is this girl ignoring...oooooohhhhhh wait.

Tové.

She turned, flashed her biggest "I'm the boss" smile and crawled over to me.

Sister, Sister

Like I'm sure most moms do, I often sit back and stare in awe at my children. I'm not afraid to admit that I'm that mom that thinks I should call the 9 o'clock news because Tové just looked at me and smiled the biggest, most heartwarming smile. Or because Tempess has completely rewritten the words to Up, Up High (that's Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star for all the nonfans that haven't bought her CD yet).

But I digress.

So in true mommydom nature, I was staring at my girls, watching them play together. Before I knew it, I was back in my childhood, watching all of my favorite TV friends go through life with their twin sister by their side and thinking how awesome it would be if I had one of those too. 

In all of our pre-baby, pregnancy chaos, we definitely wanted a boy, so we could be done. So we'd have society's perfect pair of kids. Society's perfect family of four. But watching Tempess and Tové play together, I was reminded of how I felt growing up sisterless. God has given both of them the perfect gift - a lifelong friend. Someone they can go through life with, side-by-side.

Tempess is still working to understand the concept of sisterdom, and that she's a big sister. But she does know No Mommy. Baby Sister. Me Tempess.

And she taught Tové to crawl to her, which Tové did giggling and smiling the entire time. And they cannot stand being away from each other, both girls crawling over me and Todd to smell what the other just ate as they lay nose to nose and have giggle wars.

Watching Tempess openly embrace her role as big sister, eager to share her vast knowledge of the world with Tové, warms my heart in ways I've never known before.

Don't get me wrong. Tempess is quick to tell me Mommy, Baby down, so that I can give her whatever it is she wants at the moment - dancing with her, food, kisses, more food. But as soon as that momentary desire has been met, she's back in Tové's face, singing Sister, Sister.

I've Never Bathed Tové

Tonight I bathed Tové for the first time in her eight-month existence.

It went pretty ok. It was a straightforward process. Nothing went wrong. But I never want to do it again.

You see up until tonight bath time was Daddy's thing. But, he wanted to make stew tonight since the Great Arctic Freeze is upon Chicago. So we switched roles - he's cooking and I gave baths.

Bathing the girls made me realize how much I love the roles we've carved out for ourselves. My responsibilities around the house are things that either I generally enjoy or come natural for me. I don't dislike giving the girls a bath, but it's awkward for me. I haven't regularly bathed* another little person since my sister was Tempess' age. That was 11 years ago.

Then there was the absence of laughter that usually fills the house during bath time. No, it wasn't replaced with screams or cries, but there were no squeals of joy either. I felt like I was encroaching upon Todd's territory where I was not invited. The whole experience just was not natural.

So I will gladly take my nursing, cooking, singing and rocking to sleep duties. Daddy can have bath time.